People don’t always play fair.
If they see an opening, they take it. If they sense weakness, they exploit it. That’s how human nature works, whether we want to admit it or not. And the truth? Most of the time, people who get walked all over send out invitations without realizing it.
And certain predators have a sixth sense for this, they can sniff out someone who won’t push back, someone who can be guilt-tripped, coerced, or subtly manipulated into carrying other their burdens.
You think you’re being nice. Accommodating. Easygoing. But what you’re actually doing is handing out free passes for people to use you like an Uber with unlimited rides.
Want to stop being everyone’s doormat? Here are ten behaviors that make people think they can take advantage of you—plus how to fix them before someone wipes their muddy boots all over your metaphorical welcome mat.
01
You Apologize for Things That Aren’t Your Fault
A friend shows up late to your plans—you apologize for making them rush. Your coworker hands you their unfinished work—you say sorry for being too busy to do it for them.
See the problem? It’s like your brain is hardwired to absorb guilt that isn’t yours. And once people notice? They start offloading their mistakes onto you.
How to Fix It:
- Catch yourself. Pause before you say “sorry.” Ask yourself: Did I actually do something wrong? If not, skip the apology.
- Or, start replacing “I’m sorry” with “That won’t work for me.” Not rude. Not aggressive. Just a clear boundary.
02
You Say “Yes” When You Really Mean “No”
Your brain screams NO. Your gut says NO. But what comes out of your mouth? “Yeah, sure, I can do that.”
You Think Being “Nice” Means Saying Yes
You don’t want to be difficult. You don’t want to be selfish. You don’t want to let people down. Because in your head, saying no means being rude.
And that’s exactly how you end up saying yes to things you don’t want to do: working late without extra pay, being the designated driver for the fifth time in a row, loaning money to that one friend who never pays you back.
Or, you’re babysitting your coworker’s cat, covering your friend’s rent, and spending your Saturday at a party you dread. People know you’ll say yes, so they keep asking. And asking. And asking.
How to Fix It:
- Stop confusing kindness with self-sacrifice. Being nice doesn’t mean being a doormat.
- The next time someone asks you for something, pause. Take a breath. Say, “Let me think about it.” That split second will save you from a reflexive “yes” you’ll regret later.
03
You Let People Talk Over You
Ever notice how certain people steamroll conversations? You start speaking, and they interrupt, redirect, or flat-out ignore you. And you just… let it happen.
Over time, this tells people your words don’t matter—and worse, that they matter more.
How to Fix It:
Next time someone cuts you off, keep talking. Hold your ground. If they bulldoze over you, say, “I wasn’t finished.” If they do it again, stare at them in silence. Nothing makes people more uncomfortable than a well-timed pause.
04
You Don’t Enforce Your Boundaries
It’s not enough to set boundaries—you have to hold the line. Otherwise, they’re just suggestions.
- You say, “I can’t work late.” Your boss asks anyway. You stay.
- You say, “I don’t lend money.” Your friend asks anyway. You give in.
- You say, “I need space.” Your partner ignores it. You let them.
See the pattern?
How to Fix it:
Next time someone crosses a boundary, call it out immediately. No explaining. No justifying. Just a simple, “I already said no.” And if they keep pushing? Walk away.
05
You Assume People Have Good Intentions (When They Don’t)
We all want to believe the best in people. But here’s the harsh truth: not everyone deserves that benefit of the doubt.
Some people are users. They know exactly what they’re doing. And they’re banking on the fact that you won’t call them out on it.
How to Fix It:
Instead of assuming good intentions, look at patterns. If someone repeatedly takes advantage of you, it’s not an accident. Believe what their actions are telling you.
06
You’re Afraid of Making People Uncomfortable
You’d rather suffer in silence than risk making someone slightly uncomfortable. You let the waiter get your order wrong without politely asking for it to be corrected because you “don’t want it to be difficult.” You let friends vent for hours even when you’re emotionally drained. You let someone take advantage of you because calling them out would be “awkward.”
How to Fix It:
Get comfortable with a little discomfort. Setting boundaries will feel awkward at first. Do it anyway. You’ll survive. And the people who actually respect you? They’ll adjust.
07
You Do More Than Your Share (And Resent It)
At work, at home, in relationships—you take on more than your fair share because, “If I don’t do it, no one will.” But let’s be honest… that’s not entirely true, is it?
What’s really happening is this: People know you’ll pick up the slack, so they stop trying. And over time, that unspoken agreement turns into your job.
How to Fix It:
Do less. Seriously. If people aren’t pulling their weight, let things fall apart a little. They’ll either step up—or they’ll prove they were never worth your effort in the first place.
08
You Don’t Speak Up When Something Bothers You
You let small disrespect Slide when someone interrupts you or calls you a nickname you hate.
Someone makes a joke at your expense—you laugh it off. Your friend repeatedly cancels plans last minute—you say it’s “fine.” Your boss piles extra work on your desk—you “handle it.”
Each time you let something slide, you’re training people to believe they can keep doing it.
How to Fix It:
- Correct people at the moment. Try, “Actually, I wasn’t finished talking.” Or “I don’t like that nickname—call me by my actual name.” It’s not rude, it’s setting a standard.
- Next time something bothers you, say something—immediately. The longer you wait, the harder it gets. Even a simple “That’s not okay with me” can change the dynamic instantly.
09
You Always Make Yourself The Least Important in The Room
You downplay your successes. You say things like, “Oh, it was nothing.” You shrink yourself so other people feel more comfortable.
But here’s the truth: If you act like you don’t matter, other people will, too.
How to fix it:
Own your space. If someone compliments you, say thank you. If you achieve something, celebrate it. Stop making yourself smaller just to make others feel bigger.
10
You Treat People Better Than They Treat You
This one stings. You give 110% to people who barely give you 20%. You bend over backward for friends who wouldn’t lift a finger for you. You even take on emotional labor without realizing it.
You remember everyone’s birthdays. You check in when a friend is feeling down. You listen to people vent for hours without getting a word in.
And when you need support? Crickets.
Because you’ve positioned yourself as the caretaker, not the one who gets cared for.
You treat people with kindness, patience, and respect—even when they treat you like an afterthought. That’s not fair
But here’s a cold, hard fact: People will rise (or sink) to the level you accept.
How to Fix It:
Match energy. If someone treats you well, return it. If they don’t? Adjust accordingly. Stop pouring into cups that never fill yours back up.
11
You Think Giving People Second—Actually—multiple Chances Makes You Noble
“Oh, they didn’t mean to hurt me.”
“Oh, they probably just forgot.”
“Oh, I’m sure they’ll change.”
Guess what? They won’t.
Giving people one chance is generous. Giving them ten? That’s just making excuses for bad behavior.
How to fix it:
If someone consistently shows you they don’t respect your time, your feelings, or your boundaries—believe them.
12
You Feel Guilty When You Do Things for Yourself
You finally take a day off—but you spend the whole time feeling bad about it.
You buy yourself something nice—but you feel like you don’t deserve it.
Meanwhile, other people have no problem putting themselves first.
How to fix it:
Remind yourself: Self-care is not selfish. Taking up space is not a crime. Give yourself permission to enjoy things without guilt.
13
You Think “Going With the Flow” Is a Strength
You tell yourself you’re chill, easygoing, flexible.
Translation? You let other people make all the decisions.
Where to eat, what to watch, what job to take, what city to move to—you just go with the flow. But guess whose flow you’re following? Theirs. Not yours.
How to fix it:
Have opinions. Make choices. Decide what you actually want—because if you don’t, someone else will decide for you.
Closing Thought
People don’t take advantage of you because you’re weak. They do it because you let them.
The good news? You can unlearn these habits. It won’t happen overnight, and yeah, it’ll feel weird at first. But the more you practice standing your ground, the less you’ll have to.
Because once people know you won’t be walked all over?
They’ll stop trying.
